corazon rosado

Exam destress

2011-05-15T04:42:00.004+08:00

At times, I wish I have my piano with me right now so I can play my favourite song to relax and take me to wonderland = )

Wedding of the year

2011-04-30T06:29:00.008+08:00

First of all, I would like to congratulate Prince William and the Duchess of Cambridge for a lovely wedding = )

It was Princess Diana and Prince Charles wedding when my mom was studying in the UK and now it's me here during her son's wedding. Amazing but true! ''Get me some souvenirs with their pictures on," says mom. Yes, I will soon to complete her collection = )

It is indeed every girls' dream to be married to a prince to be honest.Dressed immaculately in a starch white wedding gown and taken to the palace in a horse and carriage. It's all like a fairy tale, what more can I ask?

As for mine, I don't know when, who, where or how it's going to happen. However, I will always remember that "we can only plan for our wedding but everything is in His hands." =) =) =)

un viaje maravilloso! -Mallorca

2011-04-28T05:47:00.004+08:00

I felt like I was at home...

Thoughts

2011-03-01T03:50:00.003+08:00

There are instances in life where you really want to let it out but you can't do it personally. It's hard to understand why because you will never find the answer to be honest. That is why I fancy writing. It makes me feel so much better because when you write, you can express however you like and it's like a one way communication because only you are talking. The piece of paper is a passive listener that accepts anything you write, no matter how crap things are but you can just go on and on, it never gets bored but humans?

People say that a friend is a good listener. Well, that is true but for me, a friend is someone that listens and responds. A partner is someone that listens, responds and are always there for you, no matter how boring the topic is or how annoying or exaggerating you are. A partner is just like the piece of paper that I have been talking about but with feelings, emotions. Of course, friends have feelings and emotions too and the best thing is, they make your life happy most of the time.

Free food everyday

2011-02-11T02:51:00.004+08:00

There's so many reasons why I love to live in Edinburgh. Besides it's beautiful historical buildings, students are very much appreciated. If you are a student, all the privilege is yours! Free food available everywhere. Well, speaking of free food, one might think that the food you will get is dodgy or something like that. Well you are wrong! The food is delicious and huge!

I went to the 3 sister's last night. It's a pub, with very nice & loud music. R&B and hip hop music and I know all the songs, so thumbs up! I had a huge fish and chips for free. They also have burger and chips, mushroom stroganoff and gumbo( something with chicken said my friend). So those were the choices of free food every wednesday and to be honest the food was really2 good. I would recommend students to go there definitely. Good food, nice music and just the perfect place for students to chill out or even watch football.

So there are other places with free food that I would definitely go to. Plus, you will get student discount in every single shops at least 10% up to 40% on clothes and the most important thing food!!! So yeay for students!

The truth

2011-02-04T09:39:00.003+08:00

Everytime I read your blog, it makes me smile =) =) =)

Paris, a dream came true

2011-02-01T02:33:00.000+08:00

Moulin Rouge

Notre Dam

The Louvre

Champs de-Elysees

Sacre Coeur

Eiffel Tower.

PARIS, a city I really wanted to go years ago. The city of love, as most people claimed and now I have been there, savouring every moment of my trip. Yes, it is a very beautiful place with many historical and lovely buildings that one could never have imagined how to build such an intricate structure. As we arrived at Beauvais airport, I got really excited and took my camera out. We waited with bated breath, feeling giddy to explore the wonderful city.

It is every girl's dream to go to Paris with the one they love to be honest. And yes, I had the chance of going there with my dearest boyfriend. Thank you for being my photographer, my partner, my guide. In short, thank you for being there with me. You made my life more colourful dear.

So, on day 1 we went to Sacre Coeur, a cathedral. It somehow looked like the Taj Mahal to me. I would say, it was the most beautiful church I have ever seen in my life! The white building looked really grand on top of a hill. Then, we went to the Louvre and Moulin Rouge in the evening. Well, we didn't go in there as the thought of seeing a bunch of naked dancers as well as strippers freak me out. We just went there to take pictures of the building that had a zillion lights on it. Moulin Rouge was situated at the red light district, just 5 mins away by foot from our lovely hostel.

On day 2, we went to the famous Eiffel tower. Wow, that was the first word that came out of my mouth! I just couldn't believe I was there. It looks surreal! We managed to go up to level 2 because level 3 (the peak), was closed due to mantainence. The view was amazing. It was very windy up there. Next, we head to Champs de-elsysees (also known as arc de triomphe), grand arc de la defense and notre dam. We met up with my boyfriend's friend. He toured us around.

In a nutshell, Paris is a great place to go. There is so many things to write but I think the pictures will tell you more about it. Pictures can tell a thousand words as they say and I couldn't agree more = )

PARIS

2011-01-25T00:31:00.002+08:00

2nd semester is amazing! no 9am lectures, wuhuuu! Plus, my timetable is perfect. Not that last semester was crap but i love this year's more. Ok, so I am bonding up better with my flatmates. We went to newcastle and slept over at a hostel. Had a lovely time. I enjoyed it very much!

This weekend, Paris! Omg, I'm super duper excited! I have listed all the places I want to go to be honest. Eiffel tower, notre dam, seine river cruise, champs-selysee, moulin rouge, sacre coeur and not to forget the amazing museum, the Louvre! Going there with my beloved bf and I am so happy as this was our dream and now, we are actually going there! This is so bizarre! hehe..I love my wonderful life = )

So my bestfriend diana is here, in UK! well, she's now studying in Oxford Brookes Uni, somewhere near london. I am so happy for her. We have achieved our dream! Well, 5 years ago, me, nadiah and diana had this dream of studying abroad, in the UK and we made it. And the coolest thing ever is that we are bestfriends from the same school and we were classmates. Wow, well done girls. Big Clap!

2011

2011-01-16T00:17:00.004+08:00

A new year filled with hopes and aims. Well, first of all, I have to be ORGANIZED! No more last minute studying or going to class unprepared. So far I've been on schedule for the first week which is a good start. It feels good though and less stressful to be honest. Hehe..

6 days in london was amazing. Things have changed a lot over the last ten years. I vaguely remember the way around. I felt so lost and tiny in the cosmopolitan city! There was so many people around omg! when the pedestrian light went green, a huge crowd of people just marched along the street, pushing everyone around. It was a stampede seriously! However, it was a great holiday and I enjoyed it very much.

So back to life, my timetable is quite different this semester. Most of my lectures are in the afternoon which is quite a nice thing. No more 9 o'clock lectures and rushing to get the bus. What a relief! And I'm taking Italian this semester which is kinda cool! Piacere = )

2 weeks before I'm off to Paris, the city of love! I am so excited. Everything has been planned and of course, I will take lots of pictures! weeeee! I love travelling. Not to forget, Spain in spring! I miss sunbathing. Vitamin D here I come!!!

Mommy knows best

2010-12-29T09:36:00.002+08:00

There are times when you think you have everything in life but actually you don't. You feel satisfied and grateful with what's there for you but the truth is you just need someone. Someone that really2 understands who you are, what you want, what you need. In short, you just need your mommy. I think that is what I need right now.

Lonely

2010-12-13T18:19:00.002+08:00

Hell

2010-12-11T02:15:00.003+08:00

I have never cried so much in my life. I should never gave the chance. I should just walk away. How stupid I was. Follow your heart says a friend of mine. Well dear, I did and guess what, I'm all screwed thanks to you.

I wasn't wrong. It was just like what I expected. When I was furious and heartbroken, everything was about comforting me, gaining my trust once again but then, when things were getting ok, it started again. I was pushed away. I'm never top of the list as usual. Well shopping, eating and even something simple on the bloody website seems more interesting than me.

Yes, u listened but I was expecting a proper conversation after what happened. It's not like something u can talk about on the phone or chatting. Even sending texts or bbm, don't appeal me at all. Use your senses for God's sake!

I totally agree that humans are never satisfied with what they have. When we lose something, then we will learn to appreciate it. We will fight for it but when it's there we just don't seem to care. It's normal, things are taken for granted in real life. I just feel grateful that I noticed the fact so I won't be one of them ever.

Well, I am a human being too and that means I have feelings! Looking back at what happened, I feel disgusted and sorry for myself. I have made a terrible mess of my life and I can't go back to fix it. It's getting worst each time I say it out loud because you will never understand. However, life is full of surprises and I hope some kind of magic will surprise me soon because I can't do it on my own. I do believe God will show me the way and I'll do everything to get out of this situation. I can't shed anymore tears, it's hurting my eyes. Lets just hope, tomorrow they will be alright for the exam.

Just 7 days before I'm off to Amsterdam. I can't wait for the treat. I shall forget everything that has been bothering me all this while and I will come back to start a new life.

Unbearable

2010-11-23T03:07:00.004+08:00

I had a dream,
Something to share with you,
A dream filled with hope,
Excitement,
Joy and happiness,
But it transmogrified,
An ongoing nightmare,
Oh I wish mama will wake me up
And tell me,
Sweetheart it's just a bad dream,
I'm here,
You can go back to sleep.

I stayed up all night,
Thinking about,
Where did I go wrong?
I don't deserve this,
I felt like shouting,
Yes I am in rage,
I wish I could be angry,
But whom shall I blame?

My hero

2010-11-10T03:16:00.009+08:00

I love u syg!

My face was beaming after seeing u dear.

Happy times together

The man in kilts!

The historical city = )

2010-11-10T03:00:00.003+08:00

The beautiful view at night.

Mama, thank u for coming with me. Love u!

My crazy and adorable flatmates that add colours to my life!

Not running away

2010-11-10T02:56:00.002+08:00

Hi again. I've decided to continue blogging on my page. Well, it's kinda useless starting all over again for a dork that to tell u the truth is so out of my life. Never ever seeing him again! It's my life, so if u happen to read this just do as u please. I don't give a shit. I just love my wonderful life.

p/s : more posts coming up! To my dear fans, bear with me. There's loads to share. Toodles!

the get out of jail free card

2010-09-28T04:23:00.002+08:00

Escapism! weeeeeeee! finally, I'm thousand of miles away from the psycho dude. What a relief. Edinburgh, u saved me! hehe..well, i'm just so happy i won't ever see u again M. Fyi, i'm better off here. No more 253 misscalls whenever I get up in the morning.

I think I'm gonna stop blogging here coz I know u r still stalking me. Well, go on mr stalker, u'll never catch me again. I'll just put a full stop here. Having u as a fan was the most horrible thing ever. Toodles!

halfway through

2010-08-30T20:40:00.003+08:00

Life has been hectic so far. After the results came out, everything starts all over again. The 2 months holiday was so rejuvenating. I've been sleeping till noon which is kinda weird as I hate sleeping but what should I do? shopping, movies & loitering around seems so lame after doing it on a daily basis. So, most of my free time was spent on my soft & plushy bed!

Visa, sponsor's agreement, university matters & yada yada yada... God, it's endless! The good thing is, I'm done with all of that. It's just the visa bit that is still pending. Everything will be fine, hopefully (fingers crossed). Now that I know being an adult is pretty tough. I'm just 20 & the things i'm facing right now is killing me. I wonder how shall I live alone in edinburgh? Only God knows. Mama won't be around when I yell HELP anymore = (

Congratz Harrizs Aqmal!

2010-07-23T05:14:00.002+08:00

22 July 2010, was one of the happiest day of my life. My brother graduated! yeay! After years of struggling, all his efforts were paid off. Congratulations bro! I am so proud of you. Keep on being the best! I believe you can do so much better in the future and lead a wonderful life = )

Well, I didn't have the chance to see him on stage as only 2 person was allowed into the hall. Obviously, the great opportunity was given to my parents as they want to see their beloved son getting the scroll so in the end, me & iznie had to wait outside. Honestly, we were so freaking bored! Thank god, we stayed in an air conditioned room with plushy sofas. Despite all that, I get to spend some time with her. Yes, we talked and shared stories about life and I enjoyed every single moment. Just being there with someone my age made me feel comfortable. Thanks dear for all your advice! I really appreciate it.

As for my parents, omg we had a crazy photoshoot. Now that I know, not only me & my bro love camwhorring but them too. So it's all in our genes I supposed. Haha..thanks a lot abah & mama. I love it! Most of the time, it was me being the photographer. The moment I saw their beaming faces, I felt as if I wanted to cry. They were extremely happy, smiling all the way, I mean since we got there. I can see it clearly through the lens. I remembered those looks last 2 years. I really hope that I could see it again and yesterday I did. It was an unforgettable moment. Abang, thank you for making them so happy! Abah & mama, I hope to see those lovely faces again during my graduation day, insyaallah.

Seventeen

2010-07-15T12:43:00.004+08:00

" The best thing about me is you "

Cakes!

2010-07-11T22:15:00.007+08:00

Well, it's an apam anyway. Thanks mama for helping me bake this. Love it = )

Pissed

2010-07-06T20:08:00.003+08:00

I hate it when people judge me. Yeah, fine u have the right but please don't be so narrow minded. I might be bitchy & dress up slutty. Yes, I curse people & talk harshly, so what? Just because I don't act like a saint, doesn't make me bad. I admit, it's the first impression that counts. Just stop bitching around about me. Shut up & get a life please!

Just because u don't know me, doesn't give u the right to assume how i lead my life. It's just me being me ok. I too have feelings. Perhaps, i don't show u how badly hurt i feel whenever u give me that pathetic look on ur face. Sorry, but I don't live to please u! I cannot live up to ur expectation. I'm just a typical kl girl that loves her life. I know my limits. Just give me time. I'm so not ready for it. I don't have to prove to u how innocent i am. I'm not a hypocrite btw & yes I am so comfortable living like this.

Te quero muchu, ridzwan!

2010-06-30T22:29:00.002+08:00

Thank u for coming into my life
U r my hero
U r my everything = )

Regrets

2010-06-20T22:47:00.003+08:00

Did u know,
Everytime I think about u,
I feel sorry,
Every moment we had,
Was unforgettable,
Every words that u said,
Lingered in my mind until today,
And all I can say is why?

I tried to get over it,
But it was hard,
I cried every day and every night,
I checked my phone daily,
Hoping u'll wish me good morning,
Missing u badly,
I just want to hear ur voice,
I needed courage to endure,
the heartbreaking moments,
Yes it killed me,
It changed me,
It made me think.

Now that I'm contented with all I have,
U keep bothering me,
Haven't I done enough?
I know I'm not perfect,
I admit I do make mistakes,
But I'm just as vulnerable as others,
I have feelings,
And u just keep on hurting me,
U bring things up,
Blaming me for everything,
Although u've accepted my apology,
U promised to change,
So what is this?

I'm sick of ur silly dramas,
I'm tired of hearing ur irrelevant words,
Please stop pointing fingers,
Both of us was wrong,
And we forgave each other,
So now just move on!

Happy happy happy!

2010-06-08T21:40:00.003+08:00

Finally, I can breathe easily. It's over today. I just can't believe it, I've made it through the final stage of my 2 years in kyuem. Now all I can do is pray and hope for the best. Insyaallah, everything will be fine. Goodbye a level & hello life! It's time to socialise again & get back to reality. I just can't wait to get started!

Ok the truth is the chemistry paper was tough. I was so shocked as I glance through the questions. Yes, I freaked out for a moment but then I thought, Hanizs it's your last paper. Come on! So yeah, I carried on doing the paper until the last bit. I just want to get it done and leave college without feeling guilty. So in de end, I managed to answer all de questions, alhamdulillah before mr B yelled ok stop writing, put your pens down, close the paper. Haha..now that there is something memorable about him. His words after each exam. God, I can remember it perfectly. Pfftt!

Wow, there is just so many things to be done. I have such a long list of things to do especially with my beloved bf. Please please please let us have enough time to do all those stuffs together. Owh and not to forget my vacation to aussie. Omg, I can't wait to see harith and take pictures! gosh, I miss him.

Exams

2010-06-03T11:16:00.001+08:00

Tomorrow is gonna be the scariest day of my life. I feel so unprepared seriously but I'll try my best. Come on Hanizs! Just 2 papers left. Here comes the big ones, omg!

I just can't believe my 2 years in kyuem has finally come to an end. It feels so short and yet many wonderful things have happened to me. I learned stuffs and things I've never encountered before. Yes I'll cherish the moments forever. I'm glad to be here since the very first day. It's the people that makes life happening here. Sadly, soon it would be time to bid adious and leave the verdant uplands.

Owh, I'll have ample time to update my blog soon. Yeay! 5 days to go....

Yeay!

2010-05-18T12:46:00.003+08:00

I've never been this happy before. Omg! Everything is turning out just fine. Hopefully, this moment will go on and on forever. Btw, I've came up with a poem thanks to too much of biology. Haha..

Biophillic

Is love like an action potential?
Does it need myelin sheath?
Is it anabolic or catabolic?
Or can it be exponential?

Does love require a vector?
Is it only possible via vertical transmission?
What about horizontal transmission?
Do we possess a selective advantage when we fall in love?

Is love vital like the Krebs cycle?
Can it act as NAD or PCr?
I wonder...

Gibberish

2010-05-15T12:50:00.002+08:00

Some people just don't get it. How should I put this straight? my subtle messages doesn't seem to work either. It's like I am talking an alien language here. Please, we are soon to be adults so be matured!

Yes, I am serious when i come up with something impromptu. U can't expect me to have everything laid out every single time. I'm like any other human being. Things happen randomly, so what?

My dream

2010-05-08T22:24:00.002+08:00

Hopefully I'll get straight A's for A level & go to Edinburgh!

God knows best

2010-05-02T13:33:00.002+08:00

Life is full of challenges and unexpected things. My mom always tell me there is a reason for everything that happens. Just believe in that and you'll be fine, facing even the most difficult thing.

I'm so happy these days. My family, ridz and my beloved friends are all treating me well. It's a really good thing as I am about to face my exams soon. I'm still struggling right now.

Yes, yesterday I watched iron man, finally! what a relief after months of not watching a movie. Omg! It is indeed a therapy. Hehe..12 days to go before my 1st paper starts. I really have to work hard.

Sweetest person ever!

2010-04-25T22:01:00.007+08:00

Thank u very much dear! I love u so much!
p/s : 1 post it = 1 week since we have been together = )

Me

2010-04-23T10:52:00.002+08:00

There are times when u have to make decisions on your own. I hate making decisions especially hard ones. It's like u have to think of the consequences. U can hardly afford a single mistake as u'll be jeopardising ur future.

I remembered how mom & dad used to be by my side at this crucial moment. They'll be glad to give an advice. However, in the end, it's all up to me. They will always agree with what I say because they trust me. It's your future dear, they will say. We are here to guide u through.

I feel so stressed these days. My trials weren't good. Imperial still hasn't reply. These things really keep me worry. Somehow, I can feel that it is affecting my studies. I don't feel at ease as if something is missing in my life. Yet, I feel so lonely. I need someone to lean on. Yes, people can say that they are there for u but in real life, it's just bullshit. They come and go. The ones that u can really lie on is ur beloved family. Well looking at the bright side, maybe God is testing my patience. I have to be strong. This is just another chapter of life.

why?

2010-04-14T18:46:00.004+08:00

God, I don't know how much longer I can stand this. I'm being very patient. I think I need crutches. The pain is almost unbearable. Everytime I walk, it hurts. I want to see a doctor like now!

Be strong Hanizs. Just 2 more papers to go and off u go. I need a break!

Sortilegio

2010-04-11T13:23:00.000+08:00

Yes I am
I like this feeling
I wanna be with u forever = )

Dear diary

2010-04-08T20:30:00.002+08:00

I guess it's time to revert back to my old fashion way. I really need to get a new diary. So many things have happened lately and there's no one to listen. Everyone is so busy and I just don't feel like bothering them.

Yup I'm having my trials until next week so I won't be updating for the moment.

Biology = )

2010-04-03T11:24:00.003+08:00

I've never felt so lonely like this before. My parents are gone and my brother is busy settling down at his new place. Gosh! I wish my friends are here. If ever I'm in kyuem, I'll be gossiping and laughing all the way. However, I had to come back this week to get my license. Yay, I no longer need the P sticker which is kinda annoying. Now, I'm a legal driver and yes I can hop into any car without bothering about the red sticker anymore!

Yes bio, bio & more on bio! It's driving me crazy! Especially the action potentials & biodiversity! The solid facts are killing me, seriously. A2 biology is so much tougher than As. Mr Vroege, this is for u, I'll try my best to get a big, fat grade A as u said in tutorials. Nevertheless, the journey is so time consuming and hard! I need lots of ATP. The Kreb's cycle & ETC is insufficient. I'm switching to anaerobic respiration soon. PCr is no longer available!!! I need help.

A productive day ~!!

2010-03-27T20:20:00.003+08:00

Finally I could answer questions involving iterative methods. Thank u so much ridz! I am so happy and now I am doing exercises to test my understanding. Gosh! All this while, I was struggling on something that happens to be very simple. A level exam in 2 months and yes I am trying my best to get straight As insyaallah...

Still waiting for Imperial though and I've heard a few rejections so far. Hopefully I won't get rejected please. Owh tomorrow, I'll be back in kyuem. Trials starting on the 5th of April. Omg! I just want to get over it. Not to forget our housetrip. Langkawi here we come!

Usted tiene mi amor

2010-03-26T01:59:00.004+08:00

I don't know exactly how, when or why. I kept asking myself but still I can hardly find an answer. The moment you stepped into my life, everything changed. Yes I admit u helped me heal because you were there for me during the enduring moments. I cried so badly until I got tired and sick of it. I was so vulnerable. I even made an oath never ever to have a relationship. I can't face any heartbreaking situations anymore. The pain is excruciating and I can't bear it, no more.

People say that sometimes you just need someone to lean on. A rebound relationship so called but trust me with you it's totally different. You made me feel special and the subtle approach was a good start. You were never pushy but somehow you made me feel so comfortable being with you. I can tell you anything without hesitation. The best thing was you make me very happy every time. Yes you are funny and outgoing and I just love spending every single moment with you. You respected me and guided me to be a better person. You are willing to share and listen to my problems even at the wee hours. I love the way you laugh and just the thought of you makes me smile. Honestly, you are the nicest guy I've ever known and the sweetest as well in your own way. I trust you. I just love you for who you are and I would never ask for more seriously.

I know it's hard to cope with me. Although we've just started being together but already we are facing challenging situations because of me. What I've done in the past seems to haunt us and I am very sorry. I wish we could start off happily like other people. However, I never regretted for being with you. Instead, you made me stronger to face the circumstances. I love you so much Ridz!

Amantes para siempre = )

Baking day!

2010-03-25T20:35:00.006+08:00

Today is the best day of the year! I was super duper excited to see my friends coming this morning. We made a plan to bake this holidays and yes we did it today! Farrah came first at 8.30 am. I was so surprised to see her. Well she lives in Subang Jaya and she came all the way to kl despite the massive traffic jam during office hours. Thanks Farrah, I really appreciate it. You are such a wonderful friend. Luv ya! Oh, not to forget imrul who lived quite far from my place but still made it. We were all so hyped! So first on the agenda was making a white chocolate cheesecake and brownies. Then, it was cupcakes. Gosh! Decorating them was so much fun! We mixed the colouring and got different colours, amazing! However, the colouring stained my fingers and now it looks bloody red. It's really hard to wash it away but I'll just wait for a couple of days. It was worth it getting my hands dirty = P

We had lunch at Madam Lim's in JJ. We were so hungry! Well, we ate pretty late as we left after everything was done. The food was excellent. We also went camwhorring around setiawangsa. Haha..just love the view from above. My favourite spot! Then we went back for desserts. I was so full. Sugar attack as Imrul calls it. Everything was so sweet but yummy! Owh not to forget, we lepak2 after dat and guess what? Azri fell asleep while we were watching zombieland. Haha..caught u! Nevermind, perhaps he was very tired.

I read his blog today. Awww...it was so sweet. There was a post about me and I was really really touched. Thank u dear, I love it. I'll write something about u too soon ok, promise!

Well so many things had happened today and I am very very tired. One whole day of baking with my friends was awesome. I wish we can do it again some other time yeah. I'm off to bed now, till then.

I love you more!

2010-03-23T09:32:00.002+08:00

I am very lucky to have u R = )

IF

2010-03-22T10:52:00.006+08:00

If I could reverse the time,
If I could erase the memories,
If I could just walk away,
If I could mend broken hearts,
If I could get away from the agony,
I'll be very grateful.

If I just kept this feelings for u,
If we never met,
If u were not there through the ordeal,
If I never gave u the chance,
If u didn't tell me that u'll love me always,
I wonder where do I stand right now?

Miserable

2010-03-20T21:31:00.005+08:00

God, please help me through this!

Stupid cupid

2010-03-17T08:14:00.002+08:00

I guess it is contagious afterall and I am infected. Shit! This sounds rather strange but I kinda like it. I hope this works, insyaallah and yes Paris here I come and I'm bringing company!
= ) = ) = )

Rumpelstilskin

2010-03-16T12:09:00.006+08:00

Yipee! It's a long holiday. Well, 2 weeks exactly but I really have to be productive this time. I feel guilty you know and I have to get my nose in the books again. The thing is there's so many new movies on show. Gosh, I am really tempted to go! No hanizs, not this time. Argghh...it's really hard to stop myself from having fun. Shopping! No..no retail therapy sounds more decent. Stop it hanizs! Kiasuing sounds more like you these days ok. But just a movie won't do me harm right???

Nothing interesting happened these few days except I was a babysitter for 2 days. It was fun being with the kids. The worst part is when they cry. I was so stressed to comfort them. Sometimes their tantrums really piss me off. Thank God, I got control of the situation, yay! Kids are so adorable especially when they laugh and do silly stuffs. I had been entertained very much = )

Oh yeah, remember the weird dream I mentioned before. Now that I've come to my senses, I kinda figure it out. I have to find the name of that mysterious person. It is indeed interesting like in the fairy tale where the princess had to find out a horrible looking creature's name that happens to be rumpelstilskin. So unsual. Who gives their children strange names like that? Ok I know people named after months like april or may which is a bit rare. But rumpelstilskin is so out of the list. I hope that person's name won't be so hard. God, do help me! Give me more clues please.

Prom and graduation just around the corner. I've planned to go search for the suitable attire these holidays with my girlfriends. Omg I've been longing to do so for ages. We will have so much fun!

Love is in the air

2010-03-10T20:32:00.005+08:00

'Dah official ke?' Those are the common words I've been hearing in college lately. It's like everyone has fallen in love. I guess, Cupid must have been shooting a lot of arrows though. It' contagious. Well, it's not as if love is a disease or anything but the fact that most of my friends are falling in love is quite creepy. Yes, I am absolutely happy for them. Seeing those happy faces, smiling all the way to class. Wow, it's an unusual sight but it definitely lightens your day seeing those familiar faces beaming with happiness.

As for me, my life has come to a new chapter. A levels in 2 months and I am struggling very hard. Lets just put my love story aside for a while. I'll just wait for it to come as I am in no hurry. I still have ample time. I hope, my prince charming is somewhere out there. Well, who knows...

I am not feeling very well these days. Thanks to the extreme weather changes. I have to try to not get sick. I can't afford being sick anymore. Being bedridden is really horrible. Well that is all for now, till then.

Uh-oh uh-oh

2010-03-09T18:04:00.002+08:00

Classes went on as usual but the thing is I'm quite blurr these days. I guess, I'm in a holiday mood already. Please I need a break. Easter hols! I am so looking forward to it. Gosh, there's so many things to do. A levels in 2 months. I have to start studying seriously. Yup, that was what I said 2 months ago but I still am studying at leisure so far. Wake up Hanizs! It's time to get serious.

Topsy turvy

2010-03-06T22:50:00.003+08:00

I had a very wierd dream last night. It's like a continuation of the one I had years ago. I know it's nonsense but I am not making up stories just for the sake of a little drama in my blog. Fyi I am so not a drama queen. Alright so it is clearly understood that dreams are not meant to be remembered but somehow the dreams I had so far was so real. At least, the characters were real. I know them up close but I wonder why? Is this some kind of clue? Or is it just my unconcious mind having absurd thoughts? I wonder...

Mama was so happy to see the bday cake I made. Ok so it wasn't according to plan. I baked a white chocolate walnut cheesecake instead. It was so huge that I hardly ate a whole slice. It was so creamy and rich. I cannot go on eating like this. I'll get obese soon. However, cheese is so hard to resist plus chocolates..omg.

At last, I watched Valentine's day. Yay! The movie was nice. Anne Hathaway was very cool. I really had fun today thanks to my friend who was really an entertainer. We did a lot of silly stuffs together but I do like it. Moreover we had a wonderful sushi meal. Owh, I did not buy anything today which is kinda strange but I managed to get a glimpse on lovely shoes and gorgeous tops which is more than enough. It is called retail therapy and it really works, trust me.

Life is getting better = )

2010-03-04T19:30:00.003+08:00

I had an enjoying moment this evening. I went cycling with my friends out of the college ground. Although the heat was burning our skin, we just don't seem to care. The excitement made us forget about being comfortable. We sang and gossiped all the way. It's like a thing I used to do when I was a little girl but back then, I rode a tricycle instead. It's the first time I borrowed the college bike in four semesters. Unbelievable right? What was I thinking? I missed all the fun so far. I have to go cycling oftenly.

Then we stopped at a warung nearby. We were very thirsty and had ice tea and pisang goreng. Omg! The pisang goreng was so nice. It was crispy. Well, it's hard to find them in KL, seriously. All the hawkers care about is profit. As usual, we had a little chat at the table for almost an hour. I felt safe as Bangbil accompanied us along. We have heard bad cases lately. Trust me, Lembah Beringin is not a safe place to hang around girls. Better watch out. Even our lecturers have experienced horrifying moments. I wish that one day, malaysians will become civilised people, please.

Ok, tomorrow..tomorrow.I can't wait to get my hands dirty. I have to google the perfect recipe. I'm thinking of a white chocolate macadamia or pecan birthday cake. Sounds tempting right?

Scribbles

2010-03-03T22:00:00.004+08:00

Finally I've got an offer from Cardiff. Alhamdulillah. Waiting wasn't easy. They gave me a generous offer. So now, I'm left with Imperial. Please reply soon. Do give me a chance to study there. I'm really hoping for it.

I just want to go home. I know this sounds ridiculous since I've said that I am loving kyuem lately. The thing is I need to get stuffs done. Baking my mom's birthday cake for a start. Oh God! What cake should I bake? It's not easy to bake the perfect birthday cake you know. Well, I guess the decorating part is the hardest. The icing needs practice. It looks easy when you see someone at secret recipe do it in just a minute. I've got to try.

I almost forgot, graduation is just around the corner. Most of my friends had their outfits custom made already. Gosh, girls! So eager to look good. It's not like you are going to stay on stage forever. Just 20 seconds at most. You just get your scroll and the photographer will take a photo of you that's it. Plus mom and dad will be there for further family photos. I'll be graduating college in 3 months. OMG!!!

The love game

2010-02-27T15:49:00.004+08:00

Home sweet home! What a relief. After a week of dawdling internet, now I can go online easily. Phew! Well, as usual I logged on to fb, checked my email and blogging. What caught my attention was my ex bf fb. How should I start? Well, I really2 feel sorry for him. What a lame game he's playing around and to tell you the truth I am so not interested. I don't care. The game is so over for me. Move on, Hanizs! I remembered perfectly it was him saying it over and over again. Yes I have moved on. Sadly, it's you who are stuck in the love game.

Apparently he is flirting around with girls on fb. Adding a bunch of girls as his friend which is so not him. He even tried to tackle my best friends. WTF!! It seems like he had a mental breakdown or something. He is so desperate. Maybe he just cannot live without a gf. However, it is not my fault. It was your loss. Yes, he did begged me back but I said no. Obviously, who wants to be with a violent guy? not only that, he mentally abused me over the holidays. Honestly, he is the most sadistic person I have ever met.

Enough about him. Actually, I don't want to say bad things about him. For me, let the bygone be bygone. Unfortunately today, I was so pissed off as he thinks that by doing so, I will be jealous or whatever. Sorry, I am so over you and I am not your doormat anymore. I am loving my life right now. God, has helped me through and I feel so much better...so much stronger = )

Loving kyuem

2010-02-26T09:53:00.004+08:00

I've been enjoying college so much lately. For the first time ever, I feel the sense of belonging here at kyuem. I don't look forward to go back home anymore. Somehow, I am surprise by the way I changed. Perhaps, it's just me making the best out of my final sem.

I had an awesome dinner at La Bodega, Pavilion last Wednesday. The food was mouth watering! Seriously, I ate a lot. The tapas is super duper delicious. A must try menu whenever u go there. They have like myriad choices of Tapas. Trust me, u will be spoiled for choices! I'll upload the pictures soon as the internet connection here is so slow.

Bestfriends

2010-02-20T23:26:00.002+08:00

Boys & girls can't be bestfriends, that's what most people say. As for me, I totally disagree. The extravagant claim really annoys me. It's like whenever people see a boy & a girl hanging out together, they'll start talking and this pisses me off.

Yes, it is fun being with my girlfriends. Shopping till we drop, for a start. Doing the girly things together like having a manicure is so much fun but the thing is doing other stuffs with the opposite sex will also be fun. It is true, there are boundaries in doing so. Well, you can't suddenly hug him or call him cute names like girls always do if he is just a friend. Think about food for instance. How many girls are willing to eat anything big? They will go like sorry, I'm on a diet. I'll just have a salad. Duhh..I can lose my apetite on just hearing that. That is when guys are better companions. They just don't care what to eat. Just bring it on!

I think girls are more towards the emotional side. You can tell them everything whenever you feel miserable. They are always there to support you. As for most boys they don't really care. They will just listen. No feedbacks unlike girls.

I happen to have more best friends which are boys rather than girls. I guess, it's easier to handle them. The truth is girls are very unpredictable. They can be very jealous of each other and start talking behing your back. It's common nowadays. As for boys, they will tell u directly, which seems more acceptable to me. Plus, I feel more secure going out with them. It's like there is someone stronger to protect you from any harm. Well, you never know what can happen these days especially living in the heart of KL.

So to the people out there, please think wisely before you assume something. Especially those mak ciks. Stop bothering about other people's life. Just mind your own business! And yes boys and girls can be bestfriends. I had found mine = )

Because I love you

2010-02-19T17:07:00.009+08:00

‟How do you feel? Sherry?” I opened my eyes slowly as I heard the familiar voice. Somehow I feel so damn exhausted.‟ Oh, mother...where am I?” I was so shock to see myself in a starch white gown with blue polk-a-dots all over it and I was apparently in bed, sleeping. "Honey, thank God you are awake. We’ve been waiting here for almost a week." I stared blankly at her face, trying my best to absorb the information. A week? What was going on?

My family gathered around the hospital bed. They explained everything. I had an accident. A very bad one and I was in a coma for a week. ‟Where’s Alex?” I asked nonchalantly. Actually, Alex and I went out for a date last weekend. He was driving and as usual, we talked and laughed in the car. I was busy gossiping and taking pictures of us in the car. Then it happened and the next thing I remember was seeing my mom here. I waited patiently for an answer but none of them seem to pay attention. ‟Well, he’s on a vacation with his family,” Tamara finally said. Okay, I don’t understand what she is trying to say. He abandoned his crippled girlfriend and went to a vacation straight away? That is so not Alex. At least, he must have gotten hurt too as we were hit by a trailer. Was he having fun on crutches? It doesn’t make sense at all. ‟ Tamara, that is not funny. Tell me where the hell he is! Honey, do get some rest. You look tired," my mom interrupted as I raised my voice and made my little sister freaked out. "No...”then everything went dark. I guess I was unconscious due to the drugs they gave me.

I haven’t seen Alex for 6 months. I hope to see him one day. He still owes me an explanation. I tried to call, text, email and even facebook to get in touch with him. However, still no response. Everything went on as normal but Alex was missing. No one talked about him. It seems like he has disappeared from Earth. ‟ Hey, Sherry! Lets watch a movie tonight,” said David, my senior. ‟ Come on, don’t say you’ve got more dishes to do.” Seriously, I felt like slapping him. It’s not that I don’t want to go out but with someone like you? ‟ No thanks. I’m better off alone,” I said. ‟ Are you sure you don’t want to know what happened to Alex? See you at 8,” he said before I could answer and left. At last someone mentioned about Alex. I have to go!

Okay so he was punctual. Looking handsome as always, he stood there waiting for me and handed me the tickets. ‟ I hope you don’t mind watching an action movie,” he said. ‟ What actually happened to Alex?” I asked curiously as we headed to the cinema. ‟ Oh, that poor guy. He moved to another country to stay away from you. What?” I gulped. How come? We love each other. ‟ Well, he was so sorry for what happened to you. What are you talking about David? It wasn’t his fault. He insisted me to buckle up but I refused to do so. I was busy posing in the car. He doesn’t have to be sorry.” Tears were welling up my eyes. I guess it’s all because of me. ‟ The truth is, he has gone blind. He donated his eyes to you,” he continued. ‟ Stop fooling around David. This is serious matter,” I howled. ‟ That is the truth Sherry! You smashed the front windscreen during the accident. The doctors said you will lose your sense of sight.” I cried upon hearing that. That was why nobody talked about him. My family didn’t want me to feel guilty. "I happen to know because he called me. I came to see both of you and as his best friend I was there to give him moral support. He felt so sorry for you. He kept blaming himself as he was the one driving," he went on.

David’s story completed the missing piece of my jigsaw puzzle. Until now, I still haven’t met Alex. I really want to say thank you and hug him. Nevertheless, I feel so guilty for having his eyes. I was supposed to be blind but now it’s him suffering from my mistakes. Alex, where ever you are I will always love you...xoxo

Back to reality...

2010-02-17T14:56:00.003+08:00

I am back in college after our short cny break. Classes went on as usual. I'm had a maths p3 test this morning. Everyone was groaning. I guess we are still in our holiday mood. Only our body is here but our minds elsewhere. Haha..Thank God it's over! Well, it was quite tough as expected but I tried my best. So no regrets ayte.

Today, there's an interhouse volleyball competition. Topaz will go against Sapphire. As usual, I have to be there cheering and supporting Topaz for the last time. I'll have to make a checklist soon. Plus tonite, we'll be having the handover party. I can't wait. To be honest, it is fun being part of the house committee and mingling around with the other Topazians but it's time for the jrs to lead. I wonder who'll be the next PR. As for my batch, it's time for us to focus on our a level exam which is just around the corner. Good luck everyone!

The curse

2010-02-16T13:07:00.004+08:00

There were times
I was appealed by the way
She leads her life
Not a single frown
She kept her head up high
Her lips curved into a smile
As enthusiastic as a child

I hate the way she cries
I hate the way she lies
Trying to disguise
What’s in her sorrow eyes

I hate it when she feels vulnerable
I hate it when her emotion’s unstable
Saying that she’s incapable
And being unreasonable

As she glanced into the mirror
She stared in horror
All this while she didn’t even bother
To know that I’m her alter

Revived

2010-02-14T16:50:00.003+08:00

A weekend at home is so relaxing. I wish my cny holiday is longer but apparently we only have 4 days. I am trying my best to appreciate all the time I have. However, I do get distracted easily by the internet as usual.

I wanna go shopping so badly. Well, I have to get presents for a bunch of february babies. 10 people exactly especially for mom. I wonder what I should get for her this year. The last bday I'll be celebrating with her,I guess. Insyaallah by the end of this year, I am no longer here. So, I really have to make an effort this time. Mom, I'll be baking u a big bday cake with hearts all over it. U just wait ok = )

Most of my time was spent in bed. I don't know what's wrong with my body but I really do sleep a lot nowadays. I guess after all the late stay ups during bangsawan, I'm having a sleeping debt. Haha..so this is the way paying it back. Plus, it's hard to resist the pulshy pillows, fluffy duvet and cuddly teddy bears waiting to be hugged!

Alrite, I'm really excited to see my long lost friend soon. We agreed to meet somewhere before he leaves. It's been almost 7 years since we last met. We were bestfriends back then and I really hope we still are. It's not easy to fit in after ages not seeing each other but I can do this. We still kept in touch anyway through msn and he's still the same for me. Well, he has grown up pretty much that's normal. Nevertheless, he's still the funny and jovial person I knew. Can't wait to see u amigo.

I almost forgot that I have 3 dates to go to but I haven't made a move yet. I don't know why. I just don't feel like it, I guess. It's not them as they are really nice. I'm the one who's afraid to play the game again. Yes, love is a game for me that I end up losing in the end. It's like seeing the word knocked out over and over again when u play street fighter on ps2. Trust me, that feeling sucks. I still believe the right guy for me is out there somewhere, insyaallah and I'll just wait patiently for him = )

Bangsawan Batch 11

2010-02-08T18:48:00.000+08:00

Finally Bangsawan is over! Last night was frantic. Everyone was cheering like crazy while we waited for the results. T.O.P.A.Z, go Topaz! ubee was yelling repeatedly. I was so happy as the play went on smoothly and we had fun! That's the most important thing. To tell you the truth, I was so bloody nervous up there. I couldn't afford a single mistake as it will be so obvious if the sound system goes wrong. However, I tried my best. Thank god, we made it through. The technical department did a tremendous job. Thanks guys! It was a pleasure working with all of you.

Yes, we won bangsawan 2010, 3 consecutive years. Alhamdulillah! I have to say it was a tough fight, seriously. Every house was giving more than 100% last night and that was why the judges took quite a long time to announce the results. To make it short, we won 6 awards out of 11. They are best technical, best actor & actress, best script, best director and the most prestigious award, best drama!

Congratz to darimi, nabil and faris especially. Honestly, he was really serious about bangsawan. It wasn't easy working with him. I had to change my playlist several times, though. Do some music editing. I guess he was being very concerned about the audio so I don't really mind. Sometimes he was very nice & funny. It was really tedious throughout.Aziz & blonde were very helpful. Thank you so much guys for being so wonderful. The thing is this is my first time involved in a play. Well, as we all know Bangsawan is the college's biggest event of the year and it really worries me.

Enough about Bangsawan, now it's time for me to relax for a couple of days. I'll be free in the evening and at night. No more rehearsals! However, I'll miss the fun and enjoying moments with the Bangsawan crew. Now, I can concentrate on my studies. Yup, A2 exam is in 3 months from now. Got to start studying, Hanizs!

The struggle

2010-02-08T09:07:00.003+08:00

I feel so insecure lately. After last night full dressed rehearsal, I think I really need to improve. The audio system went very bad. Maybe I wasn't used to the new system but the thing is there's only 2 days left before the real thing. I have to do something a.s.a.p. It's really frustrating you know to let other people down. Yes, I do play a major role in Bangsawan and I have to give my best performance. Topaz, I am trying very hard to adapt alright. Just give me a bit more time and I'll make sure the sound fits in smoothly, I promise!

Alright, nothing interesting has happened these few days. Most of my time is devoted to Topaz. Still no reply from imperial. Dad keeps calling me whenever I'm in a meeting and he's pissed off because I have meetings everyday. Well, I don't blame him. He's just worried that his little girl won't have enough time to study. However, don't worry dad, I am struggling very hard to cope with both. After Bangsawan, I'll have ample time to focus on my a levels.

A frantic month

2010-01-31T16:50:00.004+08:00

I hardly have time for myself lately. Weekends just disappear instantly and to my surprise it's the end of January already! Omg! 5 months to go...

I'm still waiting for Imperial. God, please give me a chance to go there. I'm really hoping for it. However if it's not the best for me, I am willing to let go but for now I'm still expecting it.

I'm trying my best coping with Bangsawan & my studies. The truth is, I enjoy doing the work. It's not that bad afterall. Something to brighten up my day after class. Nevertheless, I have to admit I had been sleeping a lot these few days which is so not me. Enough of complaining Hanizs! Just 10 days to go~

So my life has really been good nowadays. I realised I am a happier person than I used to be. Well, I laugh a lot so far which is good. No more him to bother of. It's only me living my wonderful life, I guess.

My bestfriend is flying off to Australia soon. I am totally & utterly proud of him. He's a very nice person and he was always there for me and I hope he will always be. I respect the way he leads his life. I mean, he does have a girlfriend and he can handle things very well. People say that having a partner will deviate your attention but it's the other way round for their case. They have been together for ages! Almost 4 years I think and they are both very happy. Plus, they still want to be together when he goes to Australia for 6 years. That is so cool! I wish I had a love story like theirs.

The intimidating jargon

2010-01-26T15:44:00.002+08:00

I was surprised when I got an email from Cardiff last night. It said, thank u for ur recent application to study Biotechnology at Cardiff University. Unfortunately, we will not be running the Biotechnology degree this coming year and I am writing to ask u if u would like to change ur application to either molecular biology, genetics or biochemistry. Omg! I nearly jumped off my chair seriously. What on earth had happened to Biotech and they are not having it this year? My bad.

So today, I ran straight to my tutor and asked his opinion. He said it's a good and bad thing. I was like what??? Well, he said, at least they didn't reject u. It means they still want u and they are giving u other options which is very generous of them. If I were u, I'll research the 3 offered courses and just go on with it. Upon hearing that, I felt better. Well, he's argument was pretty convincing. Nevertheless, I went to see the counsellor for a second opinion. She said the same thing. So all I have to do now is to do a bit of research and decide which to choose from.

Yesterday was the big day for everyone. RESULTS! I tried to login at 7.30am but the internet connection was very bad because everyone was trying to check their results obviously. Thank God I was free in the morning. After trying for the zillionth time, I managed to login and check my result. Ok I was exaggerating, nevermind. I was tempted to know but while waiting for it to be processed, I felt so nervous. My fingers were trembling, my palm turned cold and my heart was pounding so fast as if I've just ran a 10 kilometre marathon! Then, there it was. But was it just an illusion? I quickly called my chaletmate to check it out and she said yes Hanizs u are not dreaming. Congratulations! I was so happy and grateful. I gave her a big hug, surprisingly. Finally, He heard my prayers. Alhamdulillah...

I didn't expect it. I mean practical was tough for me. I hardly saw the specimen through the microscope. The problem is the solution was so dilute, that's what most of my friends said. Whatever, I don't care. It's over and I am so relieved I won't have to consider any resits. Phew! Oh not to forget, tomorrow the IELTS results will be out. Ok, this week has really freaked me out. Anyway, I have to face it so be strong Hanizs.

A catchy book review

2010-01-23T18:05:00.003+08:00

She woke up every morning with a smile on her face. She dreamt of him last night as always. Life was like a bed of roses and she wouldn't ask for more. How lucky of her to have such a perfect guy and he was insanely in love with her. Nothing matters right now. He is all she needs.

They made promises for the future. Everything was well planned. A simple garden wedding with a number of guests. A wonderful apartment to stay. At the age of 25 they are going to tie the knot and live happily ever after.

Then, disaster strikes. She lost everything. He was gone forever. All her dreams disappeared and she was scared of the agonizing future. She waited for him to wish good morning like he used to but it was never going to happen. So she locked herself in her room, thinking why did this happen? What has she done wrong? Everything seemed so perfect!

She tried to be strong but facing the ordeal wasn't easy. She cried almost everyday until she got sick of it. However, deep in her heart she believed that something good is out there for her so now all she has to do is bear with it and move on.

After months of suffering, she was back. He was her past and she forgave him. Suddenly, he wanted her back, begging her, saying he can't live without her. She was in a state of shock. Feeling ambivalent, she tried to think wisely. Should she get back to him and continue on dreaming of a lovely life filled with hopes or should she just forget about the dreadful past?

Mi Casa Linda

2010-01-22T22:18:00.002+08:00

At last I am at home. It feels really good to be back. I arrived at 4 plus. My dad was smiling as he saw me. Perhaps he missed his puppet! I am a jovial person and I talk a lot, seriously. My house would be dull and gloomy when I'm not around. So folks, I am back to entertain you.

I spent the entire evening with my family. Telling them all the gossips as usual. My university offers, what I have been doing last weekend..bla3. Then I helped my mother in the kitchen to prepare dinner. I was forced to eat rice! Omg. There goes my 10 day absolutely no rice diet. Well, at least it lasted for 10 days and I lost an amazing 5 kilos. I guess, I'll just have it when I get back so that my parents wouldn't pick on me again.

The makeover

2010-01-21T22:00:00.004+08:00

Alright let's put on some eye shadow. Oh, not to forget the mascara and the eye liner. You look fab! I said to my friend as we were playing with her make up. It is really cool you know. Well to be honest, I don't really know how to apply make up because I rarely use it. But just playing with it is fun! In the end we end up laughing out loud. Haha..Actually we were trying it for Bangsawan. My chaletmate is head of the make up department. So she needs models for it. So we were the dummies!

Nothing unsual happened today. Just the mundane things..class, exercise, meetings. I just can't wait for tomorrow. By this time, I'll be at home! The thought of it made me so excited that I really look forward to go to class tomorrow and get everything done. Just a night to go! = )

Topaz rocks!

2010-01-20T21:49:00.004+08:00

I had fun this evening watching the interhouse basketball match. So Topaz was against Garnet for the finals and guess what? we won! Yipeee! Congratz to the players. U guys did an excellent job! I was there at 5.45 pm to support them. As usual, I brought all the banners, our house flag and cheered for topaz. My job as the PR just started today = )

We had a house meeting before that to welcome all the juniors. We had an ice breaking session between the house commitee and the juniors. Our house captain, Ubee gave a remarkable speech despite being very long but it was good. Something to boost their house spirit for a start.

I really focused in maths class today, thank God! I am so into integration. Well my teacher is very friendly and funny you know, also very attractive. I just love the way she dresses up. Teachers should really dress up. It's a respite for students and also a good way to gain attention. So to all my friends sponsored by KPM, please do dress up for your students!

I got a mail from Manchester again. It's like the third mail they have send to me for this week saying that they offered me a place and please check the website for more information. They also enclosed a prospectus.I guess the university is so eager to let students know about them. That's a good thing. Perhaps I should study there. I'll get the chance to meet David Beckham at Old Trafford by coincidence, who knows = P

Messed up

2010-01-19T13:30:00.002+08:00

I feel very tired nowadays. I was half asleep in bio class. To tell you the truth the chapter we are learning is sooooo boring. It's like a short chapter but Mr Vroege just kept on talking about it for almost a week. Plus today I had 2 hours straight of biology. Thank God he gave us a break after an hour. Perhaps he saw me almost collapsing from the stool. Well the stool is so uncomfortable. It's so hard with absolutely no cushion. So next time blame the lab's stool for having flat buts girls!

So my friends and I went to the cafe during the 15 minutes break. I ate something to keep me energized for the next one hour. It's really torturing to be locked up in a lab hearing something about endangered species. Yes I do care about them but I would never ever have a pet tiger or a gigantic hippo in my house. It's common sense right so why do we have to learn it? I know it sounds harsh but I'm so sick of the topic. I can almost puke. Please move on to the next chapter tomorrow...

I have a bangsawan rehearsal every evening after class. It's not compulsory for me but I have to be there to make sure the music fits into the script. It is very enjoying you know when I watch them act. They do make silly mistakes sometimes on purpose and it is really entertaining me. Seeing their facial expression was the best part. Somehow some of them just over do it especially during the romantic scenes which makes me feel awkward. Yes love makes us blind. I couldn't agree more = P

Owh and today I did something so stupid, well for me it is. I was listening to Mr Vroege in biology towards the end of class because out of a sudden I feel interested in some parts of his speech. Then my friend, let's call him X interrupted what Mr Vroege was saying and I got really irritated. I mean like hello, I'm trying to listen can you just stop it? Instead I said, Shut up X ! I said it an aggresive tone. I mean, I kinda raised my voice. Guess what happened next? The whole class just drop dead silence and stared in horror at me. I was so embarassed for God's sake! I kinda froze for a while thinking what should I do, oops!

Then Mr Vroege said, hanizs, X is not being rude but he is. I expected that coming from him. He's a very sarcastic person as if he should be blamed not X. Whatever...then I gulped and said well, I can't hear what you are saying if X keeps interrupting. The thing is I sat at the end of the class so it's very hard for me to hear and I just cannot deal with interruptions ok.

Then everything went fine. He continued teaching and my friends sort of got back to their books. At the end of class X confronted me asking what's wrong with you hanizs? I said, well I cannot hear him if you keep interrupting. Then, I left. I didn't even say sorry. How cruel of me but yet I feel so guilty. So there it goes. I just made and enemy. I hope he won't hold a grudge on me. I am sorry but the words just came out of my mouth suddenly. Like a reflex action. Whatever. I owe him an appology I guess.

The nightmare

2010-01-18T20:45:00.003+08:00

I had a terrible nightmare last nite. It was the second time I dreamt about it and it is really annoying me somehow. The dream was about everyone I love leaving me in despair and I was crying and trying to get their attention but they wouldn't care less. I was so miserable in the dream and the worst part was they tortured me! I was locked in a room full of cockroaches, eew!

So I am done with my chemistry test. Phew! It was pretty tough. I don't know how to describe it but it definitely requires knowledge in great detail not like the questions I've seen before in the past papers. Something more intriguing but rather complicated, I guess.

I had a bangsawan meeting straight after class. I was there to see the actors & actresses acting in certain scenes. It was fun u know. Seeing their expressions and style of acting. I was entertained after a tiring day and I have a meeting after 10 too. Such a hectic day for the first day of the week.

Btw there are new juniors too. The Jan intake for batch 12.5. I can see a bunch of new faces filled with enthusiasm. Well, I was one of them too 2 years ago and now I'm at my final year. Time really flies. 5 months before the big a level exam. Omg!

I just can't wait to go back this weekend. I really miss my home but again I would like to stress that I am not HOMESICK! I just like being in a loving ambience, somewhere homely. I agree kyuem is my second home but being home in my house and mingling with my family is something on top of my list for now. Ok, 4 days to go.

Today

2010-01-17T12:00:00.002+08:00

I woke up early this morning. After flipping through my chemistry notes I had breakfast at the dining hall with my chaletmates. It's nasi lemak today. Too bad for me. Well I have been dieting for 5 days including today. It's not an extreme diet actually, I just cut off rice from my meals. I was horrified when I knew my weight has increased by 3kg during the holidays so I decided alright no more rice for real!

I didn't know that a weekend in college could be relaxing. It feels so damn long if you wake up early. You will have ample time to do all sort of things. The best part is gossiping with your friends. Haha..get up to date on what's going on that's for sure.

So today, I'll be kiasu-ing I guess, since I have a chemistry exam tomorrow. Plus I'm going for a jog with my chaletmate in the evening and perhaps a movie tonight. Something to entertain me after a long day = )

A weekend in college~

2010-01-16T20:26:00.003+08:00

The fact that I didn't go back this weekend is really freaking me out! Oh yes I have changed, I guess. This semester I'll try my best not to go back during the short weekends. I really have to get used to it. I am going to be 20 years old soon for crying out loud! So there goes my teenage life. It all happened so fast...and I feel so old already.

Ok today I did something unsual. I went to Tanjung Malim for the third time in 4 semesters! haha..well I got bored you know, during the weekends everyone just lepak and lock themselves in their room. So I went there to buy some unnecessary stuffs like I always do. Wasting my money bla3. I have to stop spending for real!

Staying in college is not that bad. Well you have your friends and your own time. I mean, no chores to be done. I do enjoy helping my mom in the kitchen and do stuffs with my family but sometimes having a break is really crucial.

For the first time today, I managed to talk to someone face to face about my personal problems. At last, I had the courage to do so. I was waiting for my chaletmate to buy dinner for tonight when a friend of mine approached me. We talked and surprisingly I had the guts to tell her everything. It wasn't easy though. She's very nice. We go for sports together most of the time. So we shared our secrets and I was relieved. I didn't even cry seriously. I've become stronger finally! Thank God I am so over it. Wow!!! So there goes an agonizing chapter of life, bye2.

Superb!

2010-01-15T21:47:00.002+08:00

I just came back from an amazing performance by the philharmonic orchestra. Well it wasn't the whole orchestra just 2 of the members. A violinist and a pianist. They came to my college and played beautiful classical music from Lizst, Paginini and an italian composer. I was really hoping for Chopin, unfortunately there wasn't. Overall, I was so touched.

It's like u can feel the music. The tune was perfect. What more can u expect from professional musicians! There were about 5 selected pieces. The opera piece was very dramatic. I really enjoyed it.

The long wait...

2010-01-14T16:08:00.003+08:00

Finally Cardiff have finally answered me! Alhamdulillah..well yesterday I got an email saying that my application has been received and is under consideration. I feel so relieved. After months of expecting, this came up and it made all the difference. Thank God!

I had my Ielts exam today. Honestly, it was quite tough, the writing part especially. I wished I had more time but I managed to finish it anyway, scribbling all I could in the last 10 mins for task 1. That feeling was horrible. I mean, having to write more than 150 words based on the information given was not easy. You can't just go on writing whatever you like. Listening went ok, at least it didn't make me sleepy as usual. Some of the reading passages were interesting to me.

So the written part is gone and next is speaking. Oh, I just can't wait to end this week really. I need a break. Next Monday I have chemistry test,A2 topics. Well, minus the application part but that's a whole lot to read!

I can't wait for tomorrow night. There's a concert by musicians playing classical music at 8. I'm really excited! I wonder if they'll play chopin? I was informed that professional violinists will be performing but not so sure about a pianist. Whatever, I'm fine with it as long as it's classical = )

Yesterday, I went jogging for 2 rounds non stop around campus. It was exhausting after not doing it for quite a while. I enjoyed it very much. Seeing my friend going on made me keep on jogging. The so called positive peer pressure! We gossiped along the way. Something that girls do in common. Haha..overall I really had a lively day.

Unexpected

2010-01-13T17:05:00.003+08:00

I received a carnation from the youths in Bukit Bintang the other day. I kinda miss it eversince I came back to college. At first it was not that appealing but after watering it and putting it on my window sill to face the sun, the flower blossomed into a beautiful peach carnation!

It looked very pretty and I was so happy. Well, it was the first flower I've received in 2010. What a start! Thanks to my friend. It was suppose to be yours but it's understandable that you'll look kinda gurly if you keep it = P

First day of college

2010-01-12T15:43:00.004+08:00

Woke up early this morning . Yes I was excited to go to class, seriously. Seeing my friends again was something I opt for for the last few weeks so today is the big day! I expected a wake up call from a friend but in the end I was the one to wake him up as I got up early. Oops!

So after making up my bed, I headed straight to the bathroom for a quick shower. The water was super duper cold! I was shivering all my way out. However the excitement made me forget all the miseries. As usual, I picked something to wear out of my wardrobe and got them ironed. While waiting for my friends to get ready, I surfed the internet and read a blog I was expecting. Well, it was posted last night and I desperately wanted to read it but u know the internet connection here is so damn slow. Instead, I waited until this morning to read it.

Then, off to the dining hall for breakfast. I had a toast and a cup of hot milo, what a relief. Something to warm me up after the icy cold shower. Owh..I headed to the RC straight after that to return the books that I borrowed. Thank God I remembered. Finally, I went to class. I had a chemistry class which was fabulous as usual. Being my favourite subject, I was really eager to learn new things with our wonderful teacher, Pn Laili.

Leaving home

2010-01-11T14:43:00.002+08:00

This is it. I have to leave finally. Away from my beloved family and my comfortable bed. Aww..I'm going to miss my room. Apart from being messy, I just love every nook & cranny of my little room. Sobs = (

Ok I know this sounds a bit crazy but actually my agenda is already full for today. I haven't stepped on the car yet and there's a list of THINGS TO DO awaiting. So this evening, unpacking the heaps of things I've brought as usual. Four huge suitcases, omg! Then, I have a Topaz meeting at the cafe tonite. After that my friend Azna is dropping by to ask about amines and we planned to study Ielts together. Phew!

I'll be so tired by the end of the day. Welcome back to reality! I have classes in the morning, shit. So at 8.15am I'll be rushing to class. The worst part is the cold shower. It's freaking cold in lembah beringin but I'll get used to it again. Well u can boil water and take it to the bathroom but who ever does that for a semester every single day? Nope, I'll pass.

I guess I'll be very busy when class starts and I'll try my very best to keep my blog updated. Btw, the internet connection in kyuem is so slow. It's like ten times slower in ur chalet, seriously. However, we are so used to it. I gtg. See u later with more stories soon = )

A night to go...

2010-01-10T22:48:00.003+08:00

Tomorrow awaits. I'm done packing, finally! I can't wait to see my friends. Those familiar faces again that makes me happy and made life worth every second. Owh I feel ambivalent right now, honestly. I'll be missing home but at the same time I am eager to go back to college.

Back to reality again Hanizs! No more day dreaming. I have classes to attend but this sem will be the best ever. I'll be having 3 free blocks. Yay! So now I can focus on my major subjects bio, chem and maths for the finals. Not to forget out major event, Bangsawan which kinda worries me. But the thing I'm really anxious about is our housetrip. Yipee!

So Topaz, your PR is back once again. New cheers for us this year. Well it's something I made up and I hope this time my 'other half' will say it aloud, will you mr PR? Lets do our best for the last = )

Day of goodwill

2010-01-10T13:09:00.003+08:00

I glanced at the headline of the Star newspaper for today. I felt curious somehow and the picture seems so familiar. Oh my God! I just remembered that spot. It was at Bukit Bintang and I was there yesterday! The pictures showed people receiving flowers from youths as a sign of friendship and unity. Whoops! I got one too from one of them. Thank God there wasn't a picture of me or else I'll be so humiliated. It was on front page!

Ok my friend and I went there to find a cd that I desperately needed. The 'cd hunting' was so exhausting. We went to almost all the cd stores in bb and only one of them had it on sale and apparently it was the only one left. I quickly grabbed the cd. After the 3 hours walk, I was so relieved. Well, I almost gave up as I could feel my feet getting amputated soon, seriously.

Then we went for lunch. I was so hungry and thirsty. I mean who wouldn't if u had to walk 3 hours non-stop under the blazing hot sun? So we head off to Carl's Jr and I managed to finish a gigantic burger. Well it was for me. All the burgers at Carl's Jr are amazingly huge and delicious. Yummy!

We went shopping straight after lunch. Being a shopaholic, I went crazy as there were sales everywhere. My friend enjoyed shopping although there's no topman in bb. Haha..but overall it was a frantic evening. I really had fun = )

The last weekend...

2010-01-08T21:04:00.003+08:00

I can't believe that my holiday has finally come to an end. 7 weeks was not that long. Well, I really had a great time. My life has been a rollercoaster ride for the past few weeks. I've uncovered new things about who I really am. All those miseries made me stronger and brought me closer to my true love, God.I believe that He will never make me face something I couldn't bear because only He knows what I'm capable of,my strength, my weaknesses.

So now all I have to worry about is packing, besides the homework that I haven't done. Oops! I was planning to finish it by today but I got busy. I mean very busy! I was baking and cooking the whole day as I got very excited with all the stuffs I bought yesterday. It was awesome! hurm..maybe being a housewife is not that bad. Perhaps I should reconsider my future career : P

Throughout the ordeal, I discovered something very important,friendship. Yes we do make friends easily but are they true friends? Will they be there for you through thick and thin? Are they willing to share all the joyful or agonising moments? It's totally uncertain. However, I guess I've found mine. Thank you very much for being there for me. I really appreciate it, Bff!

So, 3 days to go before everything starts all over again. Less than 36 hours before I get back to prison! Well, I am exaggerating. It's not that bad but somehow I just don't like being away from home. I am definitely not homesick. Well, I am going to be 20 this year so stop acting like an immatured teenager. Whatever...I think it's time for me to settle eveything and ENJOY. Cheers~

Anxious

2010-01-07T21:41:00.004+08:00

Ok I am waiting for my friend to post a blog. He said he'll come up with three tonite so bring in on!

OMG, I just heard that my friend Farid, got into Cambridge!!! I am so damn proud of him. Congratulations my friend! U just became the HOTTEST ELIGIBLE BACHELOR OF KYUEM. Haha...

Right now I feel so inferior of my colleagues, seriously. They are so smart and active. An all rounder in short and it is really freaking me out. I mean surrounded by a bunch of geniuses, made me feel so down to earth. Overall, I feel so happy for them = )

Ok so that's all I could scribble for now.Véale mañana...

Bits & pieces of today

2010-01-07T11:30:00.005+08:00

I went to Bagus today to buy stuffs needed for baking. The truth is I'm really into baking as well as cooking. Well I'm not that good but at least I won't end up burning the kitchen!

Right now I am waiting for my best friend to come over. Owh..the weather is so sunny & warm today. A perfect time to swim! Just spending some time basking in the sun is something I opt for these few days. I guess I'm missing the pool back in college : P

Not to forget, I haven't visit my dear friend who just came all the way from US to spend her holidays here. I really feel bad. We had a memorable childhood together and I just can't spare some time for her. I really have to make up to her soon. Sorry Hanna~

I'm still waiting for a reply from cardiff and trust me it's really getting on my nerves. I just don't understand why they haven't send a reply letter saying that we have received your application or your application is under consideration. But no! I've never heard from them and it's like more than a month already. This thing is bugging me. At least Imperial did send a reply letter although I haven't got the offer yet, what a relief!

An unusual morning

2010-01-06T08:54:00.003+08:00

Woke up early this morning, feeling very happy. I had a good night sleep despite the 'salty dreams', thanks to my friend. Anyway I went jogging with daddy, surprisingly! Well, it's not one of our mundane activities but it was fun. Actually, it was more like brisk walking and I really don't mind being daddy's little girl once again = )

We had breakfast at Diva on our way back. The place was crowded as usual but luckily we managed to find a table. I bumped into an old friend of mine and we started to talk. The first thing she asked was 'cuti?'I was about to ask her the same thing. This is so common nowadays.

Ok, now I have to get back to my books for real! I have an Ielts exam this coming thursday. Omg! Not to forget, I have a chemistry postponed exam at the end of this month. Plus Bangsawan coming up early february. What a hectic semester coming up!

The gift

2010-01-05T18:37:00.004+08:00

A few days ago, someone left a box outside my house. It looked very nice with ribbons all over it with my name scribbled on top. As I opened the box, there it was. The cutest teddy bear I've ever seen but it was BURNT! Apart from that, it was torn and wet,covered with a scent that seems very familiar to me. I was shock! Who on earth had the heart to do such thing? The sweet little teddy is disfigured!!!

Then, as I looked inside the box, there was a photo. Yeah, my instincts were right. The person who did this was a complete psycho, honestly. I must get rid of the box a.s.a.p.

First things first

2010-01-05T08:27:00.000+08:00

Ok calm down. U can do this. There's no need to panic. I stared blankly at the screen feeling my adrenaline rush. What should I write? Omg, I am so nervous. Honestly, this is my fist time blogging and I have to post something right? So where do I begin..?

My life has been unorganised for the past few weeks. Thanks to the long, rejuvenating college holiday I've had. My biological clock has gone completely crazy. I should start sleeping according to time nowadays or I'll end up as a zombie in class which starts next week. Well 7 days to go, to be precise.

I really miss kyuem, seriously. However, next sem will be the toughest since we have our finals just around the corner. Better start studying! I missed my chaletmates more than ever. Not to forget Suman & Imrul for their jokes in class. Love you guys! And also Mr Vroege for his sarcasm. (He really deserves an award for this :P)